The Revenants

My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

View previous topic View next topic Go down

My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

Post by Guest on 2015-02-03, 12:12

The most desired thing came last night, the contract from the federation. I was so happy and could not wait to associate with new guys from my world. It's been so long time on street to fight for almost nothing, hard moments of my life. But now, I may say, the new life is open for me.
I hear so many voices behind the door. So much screaming and shouting never expecting in one place. But, hey, always I wish to join their world, so why I can't pass these doors? - asking myself from a couple minutes ago. I should not doing like this. I'm not so experienced like... Stop!
- I go! - little snap from darkest place in the hall and sound of coming steps near the doors of the Gym. I push slightly them and grand room of their gym opens.
Behind them I see few fighting wrestlers on the ring. Almost so fantastic like in TV shows I've seen in my childhood. Never expected it will be so big to see on my own eyes. There are so many posters hanged on the wall. Bright light looking from the main windows and smell of sweat can be feel in the air.

By the little moment all of sounds just got quiet - so long second for me! After this almost everything came to normal, this short attention was very kind anyway, and almost like big strike of thunder from the sky. For them probably it was insignificant, for me like a whole world locked up in this very second. My mask inside the bag appears much heavier now.

(I wear normal blue shirt on with thunder paint, white trousers and normal sport shoes. Mine haircut is short and dark blonde. Countenance of face strong and sharp with small cheeks. On the palms can be seen hard marks after many fights on bare hands)

- Evening guys! I wish to introduce myself, but probably You all heard about someone new and unexperience joining.


Last edited by Muscle Jericho on 2015-02-03, 12:14; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : adds DESCRITION to the post)

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

Post by Helena on 2015-02-03, 13:52

This is without a doubt some good stuff MJ... Hearing your background I had no doubt about that, but I also knew this was going to be different from your past experiences, that's why I told you that I, as well as any other guy here, will be here for advices. As you can see from the roleplay guide, or from any other rp written here, the format is slightly difference from what you're probably used to. A piece like this, as good as it is, it's almost impossible to throw in a show, but you can easily fix it.

1) add a brief intro, a description of how you see the scene. Where are you? How's the atmosphere? How is Muscle Jericho acting? Is he nervous? Throw in some stuff like how is he dressed, is he already in his ring attire or in "civilian" clothes? Is he wearing the mask?
2)All the thoughts you wrote there, should be put in a sort of dialogue. Could be you addressing the crowd from the middle of the ring or in a pre-recorded clip, or maybe an interview with one of the staff (you find them here http://mwanextgeneration.canadian-forum.com/f6-federation-s-staff).

SO please, "translate" your roleplay in this format, and I think it would be a good way to introduce your chracter for this week, leaving the most to the imagination for now. Then, if you're going to have a match, you can write another one about your opponent, and start developing Muscle Jericho more... But that will come later Smile

Again, if there's something you don't understand, or need some more explanation, PM me, I'd like to help you "adapt" to this new style Wink
avatar
Helena
MWA Wrestler
MWA Wrestler

Posts : 295
Join date : 2014-10-02

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

Post by Guest on 2015-02-03, 15:12

Well, fine piece of writing there, your talent is clearly visible. If there's anything.to add to Helena's "advice" is to check some rps for example. You will be top level in 0 time....if you aren't already.

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Here is right version of intro

Post by Guest on 2015-02-03, 19:38

Camera shows the outside of the Montreal Arena Gym MWA, where is standing an unknown guy in the middle of their doors. Camera shows only his blue shirt with lightning paint on, browny plain trousers and weary sport bag in his hands. From the dark corner opened bag looks out a mask.

Voiceover: Gregory always dreamed about bright future in wrestling world. Childhood spent on watching shows at TV and finding new persons to associate with. But he was alone with it. Never known his parents and his life like an orphan wasn't too nice. Bitten and bully. Someone told him: "bring his a s s to us, on the street, and we will teach You how to fight". It was a moment what changed all. After this every free hours spent on exercise body and mind for a fighter life. He trained very hard and was defeated many times.
But now Muscle Jericho known as well MJ, starts a new life... he got very desired invitation to one of the wrestler's federation. Street fights or mud and gel encounters end this night at least!


Next camera shows the ring and fighting wrestlers there. Something start happening, just a moment of silence and a newcomer turn back his head, nobody else could see his unmasked face yet. He takes out the mask from the bag and puts on his head. In this same moment camera raise up the view and it seems like a newcomer faced his destiny with the crowd. Light brown paint with darker brown colour of dots.

Voiceover: Is this a gepard or leopard kind animal? What is he doing here? Maybe he just comes here to get smash from experience wrestlers...?

He doesn't feel any fear or maybe he wants to be looks like. Just turning around his masked face on posters with superstars and wrestlers inside the famous Gym. He likes to get a small attention.

Voiceover: He looks like he wants to be recognized or to get their attention. It will be interesting! Big Woop is coming!

MJ: Evening guys! I wish to introduce myself, but probably You all heard about someone new and unexperience joining. I'm Muscle Jericho and very nice to meet You all!

By the little moment all of sounds just got quiet - so long second for me! After this almost everything came to normal, this short attention was very kind anyway, and almost like big strike of thunder from the sky. For them probably it was insignificant, for me like a whole world locked up in this very second.

And next camera fades to black.

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

Post by Prayme on 2015-02-03, 19:48

perfect Razz and thanks for the amazing help and team work from Mars and Helena
avatar
Prayme
MWA Next Generation!
MWA Next Generation!

Posts : 1166
Join date : 2014-09-21

View user profile http://mwanextgeneration.canadian-forum.com

Back to top Go down

Re: My way or the highway! by Muscle Jericho

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum